Monday, November 17, 2008
Saturday's workout was a challenge, but it didn't really worry me too much. I've had to deal with a lot of challenges over the past couple of years. Few have been as concrete as the physical challenges of CrossFit workouts, but I see both physical and life challenges as walls. Not insurmountable barriers, but something that gets in your way, that you need to power over.
Seeing walls is just my approach to life, whether the wall is a loved one with cancer, a profound personal loss, a dissertation defense, a triathlon, a mountain to run up, a box to jump on, or an hour and a half workout. They're all the same to me - they're all walls in my way, and I look at the top of the wall and see myself going over. That doesn't mean it's easy, but I never doubt that I can get over the wall. Sometimes I think there is a deep-seated anger that propels me over the wall. Maybe this isn't healthy or normal, but it works for me and it's all I know. I think part of why I identify with the CrossFit community so much is because they approach challenges like I do - they look at the top of the wall, take a deep breath, and go for it.
I realize that most people do not approach life in this way. They are probably healthier and happier 99 percent of the time, without this constant drive humming beneath the surface, this angry urge to overcome. But what about the other 1 percent of the time, when they face some challenge, physical or personal? I think all too often people see their walls not as something they need to get over, but as something holding them in, something out of their control. I think everyone is capable of scaling their walls, but we often lack the confidence to try.
My dad is facing his own wall today. He is having voluntary surgery to address a serious health issue. Dad, I wish you the best with this, and I know that if you believe in yourself, you can get over this wall and start a new life of health and strength and energy. Dig deep for that drive and power through.